sometimes

i visit second hand shops

just to buy music

that i know nothing about

music from different cultures

from different times

from different faiths

and i take it home and play it

while i do mundane tasks

and my mundane life

begins to feel like i am living

trapped in a movie

complete with background music

and i move outside of myself and

begin to observe me

sometimes

i am entertained

sometimes

i am moved

sometimes

i am disappointed

but always

i see

the movie of me

is made up of pictures

of mood, action, attitude and response

in reaction to time

that has a beginning

and an end

just like all movies

sometimes

it’s just a promotion clip i see

sometimes

it’s an episode

sometimes

it’s a complete movie

but while the music of life plays

there is always an opportunity

for a sequal

an improvement

and i am the actor

the producer

the costume and set designer

the script and story writer

and the audience

and in the end

the judge

only i decide if i am happy with the end product

sometimes

when i am outside of myself

i see myself more clearly

and sometimes

no

most times

i am happy with what i see.